Following on from the moving day debacle, by the time the Red Sox played on Tuesday night, I had been awake for 34.5 of the last 37 hours. Not exactly ideal. But you’ll probably be impressed when I tell you I managed to stay awake until the 8th inning before passing out. That’s right, only the best, most intrepid reporting for Lefty and Righty’s loyal readership.

Unfortunately, despite my best efforts, the Red Sox couldn’t muster enough offense to back up Rick Porcello in his second start since returning from the disabled list. And for the second straight game, Porcello looked like he just might be worth $80 million.

Seriously, I can’t emphasize enough just how dominant Porcello was. Six Yankee lefties went down looking at the two-seam action on his sinker as it hugged the inside corner and he had 13 strikeouts in total. You have to see it to believe it. He was electric. He looked angry. I couldn’t believe that this was the same guy who left flat crap up in the zone from April to July.

Things looked especially good early on, as Porcello went 9 up, 9 down in the first 3 innings (with some help from a Pedey-esque pick by Brock Holt at second base to start an inning-ending double play in the 3rd).

In the bottom half of the inning, Jackie Bradley, Jr. doubled off the Monster and Pablo Sandoval singled on what looked like an impossibly low pitch (I guess that’s what Panda brings to the table) with two outs to bring Bradley home. It didn’t look like a fantastic opportunity to score, but Brett Gardner biffed it on one hop and lost any chance to throw home. 1-0, Red Sox.

Although Porcello gave up a deep looping hit by Alex Rodriguez to left field, Bradley kept the slow-moving DH at first base with a typically strong throw into second base. Porcello struck out the next two batters and everything seemed to be under control. But Travis Shaw let a tough but fieldable ground ball from Didi Gregorius bounce under his glove (somehow this is not an available video to watch), and Gregorius and Rodriguez advanced to second and third, respectively. Stephen Drew, batting .203 on the season, stepped to the plate and poked a double to the gap in left-center to score both runs, and the Sox were suddenly losing, a development that Porcello definitely didn’t deserve (alliteration!).

The Sox offense mostly fell victim to bad timing in this one. Bradley doubled again in the 5th, but everyone else struck out around him. To be fair, Michael Pineda had a pretty good game himself, striking out 7 over 6 innings. But even when relievers came in, the Sox struggled to make a significant enough impact to score. When Holt and Blake Swihart singled off Justin Wilson and Dellin Betances, respectively, with two outs in the 7th, Bradley came up again after having already hit two doubles, but struck out to end the inning.

At this point, in the top of the 8th, Porcello made his only actual mistake of the night: he tried to sneak an inside fastball past Brett Gardner, and Gardner knew it was coming. He hooked it down the right field line for a home run around the Pesky Pole to extend the Yankee lead to 3-1.

Betances clearly didn’t have his best stuff, but he didn’t need it because the Sox shot themselves in the foot in the 8th. Mookie Betts and Xander Bogaerts both singled around a Sandoval fly out, so with runners on 1st and 2nd and 1 out and David Ortiz at the plate, Lovullo put on the double steal, or a hit and run, or something. It didn’t work out.

I’m pretty sure he was safe. He looks safe to me. But I guess there wasn’t enough evidence to overturn it? Whatever. Anyway, the other main problem with the Red Sox lineup last night reared its head as Ortiz had to finish his at-bat down in the count 1-2. He struck out on the very next pitch to strike out for the 4th time in the game and earn his first golden sombrero of 2015!

Boston went quietly to Andrew Miller in the 9th. Rusney Castillo was hit by a pitch, but everyone else struck out, including Swihart’s second check-swing strikeout of the night. 3-1, Yankees, final.

Notes:

1. Jackie Bradley, who has a .938 OPS, the highest on the team, is still batting in the 9-hole. You don’t have to be a stathead to see the need for a change there. He’s the only member of the team who didn’t have 4 plate appearances in this game.

2. Noe Ramirez struck out A-Rod and Chase Headley in the 9th to bring his ERA down from 5.40 to 4.76. It’s the first time he hasn’t given up a run for the Sox this year.

3. The moving day post was one of our more popular posts in a while, perhaps because the Facebook description was: “Read this if you enjoy reading about the misery of others!” I guess what I’m saying is that you guys are bad people.